And then you went out and did this...

Whooooooooosh. That is the sound of the air being sucked out of my lungs as I saw this headline today.

Jays close to signing Eckstein: Report

I try to keep the swearing to a minimum on this blog but what the mother fucking fuck fuck fuck are you fucking thinking you stupid fucks? Honestly...

The guy has some mystique in this league because he is a feisty, gritty, sand-paper eating midget but you know what? He is still a below average shortstop who has no arm. In fact, he looks like a girl when he throws.

I can imagine how the conversation went between JP and one of his advisers.

JP: I don't know if we can trust John Macdonald to be our full time shortstop. Yes, his defense is superb but his bat is atrocious. Check who else is out there.
Adviser: (scans list and eyes begin to light up) David Eckstein!
JP: What do his numbers look like?
Adviser: Who cares about his numbers? The guy is like Derek Jeter trapped in my 14 year old brother's body. He is perseverance personified. Stop asking such silly questions.
JP: You're right. Do you think we can get him for $4 million?
Adviser: Let's offer him 4.5 just to be safe.

So now we are left with a Gold-Glove caliber shortstop who can't hit to save his life and an offensively mediocre Eck who can barely throw the ball to first. Awesome.